Tuesday, June 3, 2025
What Makes a Sentence Too Long?
One of the most common problems writers face—especially those eager to sound professional or thorough—is crafting sentences that are simply too long. These sentences can be exhausting to read, confusing to follow, and ineffective in delivering a message clearly.
Let’s break down what constitutes a sentence that’s too long, why it happens, how it affects your writing, and what you can do to fix it.
What Is a “Too Long” Sentence?
A long sentence becomes too long when it:
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Loses clarity
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Overloads the reader with information
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Creates confusion about the main point
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Contains multiple ideas that could be better served in separate sentences
There is no exact word count that defines a long sentence—some long sentences are well-written and clear. But when length obstructs understanding, the sentence needs to be trimmed, simplified, or split.
General rule of thumb: If a sentence goes beyond 25–30 words, pause and consider whether it could be improved.
Why Writers Create Overly Long Sentences
Here are some common reasons why writers fall into the trap of writing sentences that are too long:
1. Trying to Sound More Professional
Many people think longer sentences sound smarter or more academic. But effective communication isn’t about sounding sophisticated—it’s about being understood.
2. Cramming in Too Many Ideas
Writers often try to fit several points into one sentence, thinking it will save space or flow better. In truth, this often leads to cluttered and disorganized writing.
3. Overusing Commas, Semicolons, and Conjunctions
Writers who use too many coordinating conjunctions like and, but, or so, or too many clauses joined by commas or semicolons, can end up with complex, rambling structures.
4. Avoiding Periods
Some writers simply avoid ending sentences, believing long continuous thoughts flow more smoothly. But overextension usually weakens rather than strengthens the writing.
What Happens When Sentences Are Too Long?
Let’s look at the effects of overly long sentences on writing and readability:
1. They Confuse the Reader
Long, winding sentences make it hard to identify the subject, verb, or main point. A reader may have to reread to understand what you meant.
2. They Obscure Your Message
If a sentence contains too many ideas, the core point gets lost. This diminishes the impact of your argument or story.
3. They Weaken the Rhythm
Good writing has rhythm—short, punchy sentences mixed with longer ones. Long sentences only, or overly extended ones, flatten the tone and exhaust the reader.
4. They Hurt Readability
Readability tools like the Flesch-Kincaid score use sentence length to evaluate clarity. More long sentences = lower readability.
Identifying Overly Long Sentences: A Practical Guide
Here’s a simple checklist to help you evaluate your sentences.
Ask yourself:
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Can I read it out loud without pausing for breath?
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Is there more than one idea trying to coexist in the sentence?
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Do I see multiple clauses separated by commas, conjunctions, or semicolons?
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Would a reader need to reread to fully understand the sentence?
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Does the sentence feel heavy or overwhelming?
If you answer yes to one or more of these questions, your sentence is likely too long.
Examples: Revising Long Sentences
Let’s look at a few examples of long sentences and how to improve them.
Example 1: Academic Overload
Too Long:
In considering the sociopolitical landscape of early 20th-century Europe, particularly in the context of the economic instability caused by post-war reparations and the rise of nationalist movements across various nations, one must also account for the cultural shifts that were simultaneously occurring as a result of industrialization, urbanization, and evolving class dynamics.
Improved:
Early 20th-century Europe faced deep sociopolitical challenges. Economic instability from post-war reparations and rising nationalism shaped much of the political climate. At the same time, cultural shifts emerged from industrialization, urbanization, and class changes.
Why it’s better: The ideas are the same, but splitting the sentence improves clarity and flow.
Example 2: Business Communication
Too Long:
We aim to leverage our strategic partnerships, internal efficiencies, and expanded logistics capabilities to enhance customer satisfaction, improve response time, reduce operational costs, and position ourselves as the market leader in cloud-based fulfillment services.
Improved:
Our goal is to enhance customer satisfaction and improve response time. We’re doing this by leveraging strategic partnerships, streamlining operations, and expanding our logistics capabilities. These efforts will also reduce costs and help us lead the cloud-based fulfillment market.
Why it’s better: The revised version turns a dense sentence into clear, actionable points.
Example 3: Everyday Writing
Too Long:
My dog, who is normally very friendly and calm around new people, especially those who have pets of their own or bring treats, suddenly growled at the neighbor when she came over with her cat, which was unusual behavior for him and made me wonder if he was feeling sick or had been startled by something I didn’t see.
Improved:
My dog is usually calm and friendly with new people, especially those with pets or treats. But yesterday, he growled at our neighbor when she visited with her cat. That was unusual and made me wonder if he was sick or startled.
Why it’s better: We preserve all the information but make it easier to follow.
Tips to Avoid Overly Long Sentences
Now that we know how to spot and revise long sentences, here are techniques to avoid writing them in the first place.
1. Stick to One Main Idea per Sentence
Each sentence should do one job: explain a fact, make a point, describe an event. If you're trying to do three things at once, it's time to split.
2. Use Periods Generously
Don’t hesitate to break up a sentence. Shorter sentences create a pause, helping the reader absorb information more easily.
3. Limit Subordinate Clauses
Clauses that begin with “which,” “that,” “although,” or “because” can multiply quickly. Use them carefully.
4. Avoid Chains of Prepositional Phrases
Too many phrases like in the event of, as a result of, on the part of clutter your writing. Choose cleaner alternatives.
5. Read Aloud
Reading out loud exposes clunky structure and unnatural rhythm. If you run out of breath, the sentence is probably too long.
When Long Sentences Can Work
Not all long sentences are bad. In literature and rhetorical writing, long sentences can build suspense, reflect stream of consciousness, or convey complex ideas.
Example from literature:
“It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.” — George Orwell
This sentence is technically long for its era, yet tight and effective.
However, long sentences that work are:
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Well-punctuated
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Logically structured
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Built with rhythm in mind
If you choose to write long sentences, do so with intention—not by accident.
Conclusion: Keep It Clear, Keep It Clean
A long sentence becomes too long when it loses its reader.
Remember, good writing isn’t about packing as much information into a sentence as possible—it’s about delivering ideas with clarity, flow, and purpose.
To summarize:
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Watch for multiple ideas packed into one sentence.
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Use periods to separate thoughts and improve rhythm.
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Choose clarity over complexity.
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Trust your reader to connect dots; don’t do all the work in one sentence.
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Read your work out loud to check natural flow.
Ultimately, a well-crafted sentence—whether short or long—should make your message stronger, not harder to understand.
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